Special Pre Three Weeks Shuir in Memory of Meir Yitzach Ben Avraham
Yisroel ( Geoffrey Mark Safier ) for his 30th Yartzite Given
by Rachelle Silver
On Lunch time Monday 24th June at 1.15 pm
"This Too Will Pass" –
"A guide to Getting Though the Darkness of the
Three Weeks with strength".
As we approach the three weeks I do so with a heavy heart, not only it
this historically a time of horrors and trauma for the Jewish people but for
all of humanity too.
The
17th of Tammuz is the first of four fast days mentioned in the prophets. The
purpose of a fast day is to awaken our sense of loss over the destroyed Temple
– and the subsequent Jewish journey into exile.
What Happened on the 17th of Tammuz?
Five great catastrophes occurred in Jewish history on the 17th of
Tammuz:
- Moshe
broke the tablets at Mount Sinai – in response to the sin of the Golden
Calf.
- The
daily offerings in the First Temple were suspended during the siege of
Jerusalem, after the Kohanim could no longer obtain animals.
- Jerusalem's
walls were breached, prior to the destruction of the Second Temple in 70
CE.
- Prior
to the Great Revolt, the Roman general Apostamos burned a Torah scroll –
setting a precedent for the horrifying burning of Jewish books throughout
the centuries.
- An
idolatrous image was placed in the Sanctuary of the Holy Temple – a brazen
act of blasphemy and desecration.
Agonizing over these events is meant to help us conquer those spiritual
deficiencies which brought about these tragic events. Through the process of
"Teshuva" – self-introspection and a commitment to improve – we have
the power to transform tragedy into joy. In fact, the Talmud says that after
the future redemption of Israel and the rebuilding of the Temple, these fast
days will be re-dedicated as days of rejoicing and festivity.
As we look around us this time of the year is a time of horrendous and
tragic news that’s is not just effects the Jewish people but all mankind. As we
approach the three weeks and throughout the three weeks I steel myself for all
kinds of shocking, depressing, and alarming events to be broadcast and
constantly say to myself this too will
pass.
So why do we have to go through dark and desperate times? Let's go
back a bit and look at the Torah.
Look at the end of
Bəmidbar ,it says "these are the journeys of the Israelites, who
left Mitzriam ( Egypt) in organized groups under the leadership of Moshe &
Aharon; Moshe recorded their stops along the way as Hashem commanded.
"
For the next forty three verses the Torah lists every single one of
the 42 places that the children of Israel stopped
and camped in the desert on their way to Israel. What makes these 42 stops important enough to
list in the Torah?
Each one of the forty two stops on the very lengthy challenging journey from Egypt to Israel marked a step of
assent to a higher level to become closer to Hashem
According to the Midrash, each stop constitutes another step
towards their goal. which was complete spiritual commitment and total belief in
Hashem and his greatness. As well as to enter the Promised Land.
Therefore listing each stop will remind generations to come, that
although the journey was arduous and full of setbacks and dark times, but in
the end the Children of Israel reached their destination.
The Torah presents a pattern for all Jewish people, and for
every neshama that comes into this physical world: we all are meant to go through
42 major trials from the time of birth till re return our soul to our maker;
during that time we will all experience a number of assents and descents of
varying intensity, highs and lows, light and darkness till we grow. Each trial
or stop we have will take us to the next level of our personal journey. We
halt, we cry we despair, we feel inadequate, and then we make it through.
In The book " The Garden of Emunah" by Rabbi Shalom Arush",
he reminds us that Hashem only sends us trials and tests to prompt us
to turn to him, when everything is going along hunky dory , we fall into
a trap and can forget that everything comes from Hashem. When we pray and call
out to Hashem from the bottom of our heart that strengthens our connection and
our Emunah. Emunah & Prayer is our
amour in our battle against dark, distressing & challenging times in our
life.
I liken the three weeks to a personal journey that I have to take every
year, as It approaches I notice the news not only in the Jewish world but the international world is
grim, things happen that are scary to say the least, I prepare to enter a long dark tunnel that has an uneven
surface, I trip, struggle, bang myself, get up heal, move forward trip again:
I remember this is from Hashem, heal a bit quicker move further forward and then trip again but this time as I get up
I see a dim light at the end of the tunnel, with strength from Emunah, prayer
and resolve I move towards the exit, with my battle scars but stronger for the
journey.
Sometimes when we dread something more than anything we make the
situation worse than it is.
I was incredibly close to my Father, he was not just my father, he was
my friend and advisor, an incredibly intelligent creative humorous human being.
We could talk about ANYTHING. He was the first foodie I ever met and would
advise me on flavors, his eye for color cut and fashion made him my clothes
shopping buddy of choice, his knowledge of antiques and history would have us
talking at great lengths, while his observation of human nature mixed in with
humor would have me giggling down the phone line during our twice daily phone
calls.
My father wasn't an observant man, but he taught me to be polite, to
care for your fellow Jew, and if you don’t have money to give to others to give
your time. He taught me to always see the other persons side, and that everyone
has a place in this world and deserves respect.
My close friends knew that My
father was the most important person on the planet for me, and me for him, his
increasing ill health was an persistent
worry for me. I use to say "What I will do when my father dies".
My friends and I expected me to crumble, many thought I might never
recover.
On the 18th Av, 30 years ago, my father suddenly without
warning, at the age of 56 returned his soul to his maker he had been joking
with a nurse, laughed smiled had a major stroke and died in a matter of seconds.
I had seen my father 48 hours earlier, prior to my visit to the North of
England for three days. In the days preceding cell phones, from a public phone
box in a country pub near Durham, I phoned where I was staying in Newcastle, to
say I had been delayed and to eat without me, they told me the police had been
and my Father had died.
It was seven hours after his death that the light went out in my life. I
screamed the loudest scream I have ever heard leave my body, collapsed on the
floor and apparently said nothing but "no, no no", for four hours of
the overnight drive back across the country. Stopping at phone boxes and a good
friend overnight to arrange, my father's Funeral people were informed of his premature
death as the pennies ran out.
I sat Shiva on my own, my parents were divorced and he had no siblings
or other children; some brought me the book the Jewish way in death and
mourning, I was fascinated. On the last day of the Shiva I didn't leave my
bedroom, hiding away from reality, the prayers went on without me. My
grandmother (my mother's mother) came to my apartment the day I got up from
Shiva, and she said today we will walk round the block together. This she
explained was so my first encounter with the outside world someone had to accompany me on this walk: I lived by the
sea, the wind blew through my hair, I walked with someone who loved me and whom
I loved, I realized that although life
would never be the same, I could and would survive.
Out of the depths of my grief I started an ongoing dialog with Hashem, I
asked for strength to get through, I asked for the ability to believe that all
things are for a reason.
From the lowest point of my enveloping darkness and despair 16 long
months later I reached the pinnacle of pure unadulterated Joy. As my newborn
baby son was placed in my arms. As I looked down and saw his face, I knew that
I had come through a very dark place into sunshine.
The three weeks is a difficult desperate period.
You will feel stressed, confused, dark times, discombulated.
Situations and people might feel out of control.
The way to get through this is multi-facetted
Remember and keep reminding yourself everything in life is
from Hashem, it is heaven sent
every little thing is for a purpose , some we do not understand, we
don’t want to even try, just accept it with pure Emunah… kicking against
something won't change things and will only make it worse.
Every time you hear bad news or feel distressed say to yourself this
is the time of bad news this too will pass
Think before you act and speak: historically this is a time of
conflict. Also Frayed tempers On Sunday, 28 June 1914, at approximately
10:45 am, Franz Ferdinand and his wife were killed in Sarajevo, the capital of
the Austro-Hungarian Empire by an angry young man, one Gavrilo Princip, 19, the
event led to a chain of events that eventually triggered World War I. This
broke out during the 3 weeks, an event in the wider world that greatly affected
European Jewry.
Every time you stumble, arm yourself with prayer and Emunah,
Rabbi Nachman of Breslov said "life makes warriors of us all to emerge
the victor we must aim our self with the most potent of weapons, Prayer." So you're in that tunnel, you stumble, it’s a
setback, but you can get through with prayer.
If we think back over our history we as individuals or as a people have survived
seemingly unbearable pain but we have come through with strength.
Yosef, was thrown into prison, but we learn that all times he danced ,
his demeanor got him through, he was polite and cheerful, the guards warmed to
him, he was released to the most powerful position in Egypt.
More recently when in camps the Jews marched to the gas chambers
defiantly, singing "Ani Ma amin, be emuno sh'laymo. I believe with complete faith " from the 13 principals of faith. When others
faced with this kind of situation would have run kicking and screaming, as Jews
we walked with our heads held high believing that everything that everything
comes from Hashem.
The three weeks is a test we have to go through every year, but with
Emunah, love for your fellow Jew, prayer understanding, you will get though
that tunnel, So hang on to your seats this will be a bumpy ride, Don’t lose site of the end of the journey, you will get
through. This time will pass, As they say in the classics what doesn’t kill us
makes us stronger, Out of dark and difficult times come amazing strength and
good times; the Maharal of Prague reminds us that after the three weeks of
complete darkness and in some cases despair that our future redeemer is to be
born on the 9th of Av. May Hashem grant you all the insight and strength &
Emunah to get through & may we we see the redemption of our people soon.
